The scale smiled with a 165.5 this morning. No workout because I'm making up time for a holiday lunch I'm taking with my coworkers today (how does that work?). Tonight, more work in the basement and tomorrow? Leg day. Tough stuff! I've discovered that, even though I'm given back calories for the workouts I put in, if I don't use them, the weight comes off. It's hard because I want to eat more. I'm convinced I've got to eat better, not more. Do I detect a goal for the new year? Yeah, I think it's been brewing for a while. I'll get it down here soon I'm sure.

In the meantime, I'm enjoying this number and hope that it creeps on down a little further over the coming days. Could it be that I might actually lose weight rather than gain it this holiday season? Hmm. I'll believe it when I see it.

Salt is definitely my enemy. I have seen no change in two weeks, but I've been inhaling the stuff like crack! It seems I want it and sugar more than anything on the planet when TOM is set to appear (which it did last night). When I use some self-control, I'm able to prevent the cramps from hell and the stave off the bitch inside; however, most of the time, I cave into my cravings. Then, what happens? Why, the cramps from hell and the bitch inside come to the party. Water is truly the trick. I've got to get my water-schedule back under wraps. I've also been slacking on my food entry. So, for the past two days, I've made sure every morsel has been logged.

An observation: when I work out, I'm hungrier through the day. This doesn't surprise me, but I tend to just make my limit when I'm eating (my limit also changes as soon as I enter workout time). For example, my standard max of calories for the day may be 1, 315 (that's not it, but this is for the example). When I enter my workout time, say 30 minutes on the elliptical, that 1315 suddenly becomes 1515. Well, I'll just about make that 1515 before the day's end. The observation I made is that when I workout, if I keep it at the standard max, the weight disappears. It's so hard, though. The body is in need of more food because of the workout, so I feed it. Then, I deal with no movement on the scale. It could be that I'm not taking into account that my water is less than ideal and the Salt Monster is every present.

So, what do I do? First, I'm going to try and practice some self-control next month. The goal will be not to cave into my cravings. Try as I might, I always have a lot of trouble, so it will need to become a mantra of sorts. This week, I've also been going for my water again and the process of getting back to 2 liters has begun. This one is tough, but I've done it before. I can do it again. Finally, I will need to see about changing what I'm eating for lunch. The frozen meals are wonderful and convenient, but they're full of salt. I guess they have to be or they wouldn't taste like much. Healthy Choi.ce does a pretty good job of not going too nuts with the salt they add, but it's still quite a bit (typically 600 mg). If I make my lunches at home (like my hubby) I'll probably be better off. This also means more cooking (and more work).

I've got a lot to try and figure out, but I'm not discouraged. No change is better than a gain and I'm grateful. I would, however, like to see those numbers dropping again. I gotta be bathing suit ready in a just a few short months! Eye on the prize...

The numbers have been around the same, so no change for last week. I've been working out and doing the 30 or more minutes on my elliptical trainer. On days I don't, I've been firming it up with The Firm - Standing Legs, The Firm-Upper Body and The Firm-Tough Tape 2. All leave me dripping wet and exhausted, but I'm pleased with the results. The weight isn't changing, but my body sure is.

I think once TOM comes and goes, I'll let go of a lot of this excess water. It's the same story every month. I just wish I knew how to combat this without taking diuretics. Playing patient is not an easy thing to do...especially when it comes to weight. Ugh!

For me, I'm happy if I don't add extra poundage in the next few weeks. I've been dipping into the Halloween candy and that's got to stop. I threw away the cupcakes I made because no one was eating them but me, and they were just sitting there anyway. I was having maybe one every couple of days. The recipe made twenty-four. I brought 8 to work and the girls each had one. I've probably had four or five. They were just getting moist and going to waste.
For Christmas, I will definitely make my rum cake, but I know I won't be eating that alone. It's a family favorite and shouldn't last too long in the house. That will probably the sweetest thing I eat in the next few weeks. My most immediate goal is to stay strong and not touch any of the treats my neighbors try to push on me. Oh, the holidays!

Today's weigh-day number, 167.5, is probably the result of skimpy eating yesterday and furious cleaning this morning. We had a sort of gathering and meal at work yesterday morning and I did my eating there. By lunch, not only was I too busy to get lunch but I was still full from the morning meal. I didn't eat again until close to 7:00pm and it wasn't much; white rice and pot stickers. I then allowed myself a few of my hubby's Salt and Vinegar Lays (which were divine) and a glass of South African Shiraz. It was divine, too. I love the after-taste or the flavors that linger on your palate after drinking Shiraz. I think it's my favorite red.

For the next few days, I'll be home and I'm thrilled! This morning, I've been cleaning like a mad woman. My house was, to put it frankly, disgusting. So, I vacuumed, mopped, polished, dusted and scrubbed. My house now has that lovely pine smell and my feet no longer stick to the kitchen floor. I've got a candle burning, so soon it will smell like spice and pumpkin pie. Tomorrow, I'll take it easy...expending my energy only on the dessert I will make and take to my mother's. Friends are supposed to be coming, so it should be nice; however, I'm worried about the state-of-mind my sister is in. She could destroy the day for everyone with just a word.

Finally, we'll be getting our tree today (probably from Home Depot) but I'm going to run to Tai Pan Trading to see if they have any worth looking at. I can't spend any money today (Unfortunately...fortunately). I just took a look at my account and it is beyond scary. If someone tries to cash a check, they're going to be in for one rude awakening. I hope our pay checks post tonight otherwise, I'm going to have to rob from my savings to save my butt from bounce heaven. Oh, the holiday shopping!

Well, pretty dang good if I must say so myself. I wore a size 8, black velvet dress to church yesterday, similar to the one on the right but with a much more flattering neckline. I was actually quite surprised at how well it fit. Of course, it is velvet and has quite a bit of give. The nice thing was that, even with the give, there weren't tons of rolls accentuated by that velvet. I was quite pleased. I even bought gel inserts for my goal shoes and wore them with the dress. I'm sure other people noticed, but no one really commented except my mother.

My weight this morning was 167 and I'm pleased but I'm a bit concerned about the impending holiday. I don't think that I'll gorge. We have outside guests coming and that always helps to put my eating in check. No one wants to look like a big sow in front of company. My plan is to weight train that morning...get my metabolism up running high enough to combat any extra calorie consumption for the day. Perhaps I should plan on an extra 15 or 20 minutes on the elliptical the day before, too. It couldn't hurt. I'm off that day and I think I can find something to amuse the kids for an hour or so.

My mother is currently in a six and is having a devil of a time trying to find things to wear. She doesn't wear trendy clothes, which is why it's so difficult for her. I hadn't even thought of that! I know Ann Taylor carries smaller sizes, but they're rather expensive. Macy's is good about tiny clothes and she's picked up quite a few things from there. I also suggested Ross Dress for Less and reminded her about that awesome discount she gets (senior citizen), but they tend to be a bit trendy too. Besides that, you have to sort of go in with the idea that you're going to spend some time there. You gotta dig for what you want.

I wondered, as she was telling me about her plight regarding the search for the smaller sizes. Will I have this to worry about in the future? I've never been a six (always wanted to be one, though) and I think it would be terrific to be able to get into things labeled small for a change. I don't mind the trendier stuff, as long as it's not too naked. Could I be one of those shopping at 5*7*9 or WetSeal in the future? Oh, yeah. They tend to be on the naked side of trendy.

There's a store in our local mall called Mariposa that has some of the cutest dresses I've ever seen, but I've always been to big to wear them (I think it's a teen store, but I can wear teen clothes when I'm this size and smaller). Perhaps that's something to reach for. Hey, I feel a goal item in the works. Which reminds me, it's time to do those again. My other goals are nearly reached and it's time to strive for even "leaner" and better things:

• 35lbs (159) - New Perfume (more KL or Caesar's woman) Goal! Thursday, April 10, 2008 - 159.2
• 40lbs (154)- Time for new pair of shoes - Mary Jane's or Steve Madden's
• 45lbs (149)- New dress from Mariposa (or some other shop for smaller folks)
  
• 50lbs (144) - a new bikini from Carabella

If I happen to go past the fifty pound mark, I'm thinking I would have earned myself a ticket to Lasix Land. My hubby shouldn't be the only one in the house no longer sportin' the spectacles.

The happy 160s are still here and the magic number on the scale was 169, so I wore my shoes...and they were too big. *Sigh* I still wore them and got lots of compliments and felt fabulous, but I'm bummed because they are in my size, they just fit a bit wide for me. I think if I put in an insert that will help but I can't be sure. I don't want to ruin the inside of my shoes if it's not going to make a difference in how they fit.

I worked out yesterday morning and did okay. I wasn't out of breath, like I thought I would be, and I kept it up around a half hour. I did the same this morning and am thinking that I might try my weight training on Saturday. I think that's what is making the difference in how I look and how things are fitting on me (I'm in a ten, by the way...and it's not strangling me or too tight). Hubby even said, "Hey, those are loose!" Who knew! I think it's all those lunges and "up and down" on the 12" stool. Talk about but-kicking exercises! Seriously!

Anyway, I am happy to be back in the 160s but, as they say, we're never satisfied. I keep thinking, This is where I got stuck the last time. Will I crest into the 150s or am I destined to stay in the 160s for the rest of my life? I guess time will tell. I haven't hit up my program with hubby yet nor have I changed my eating habits to that of a figure competitor. Phew! That's going to be rough when I do. I just can't get excited about tuna and oatmeal everyday. I suppose I have to change my thinking to that of food being for nutrition and not necessarily for pleasure. And, it's not forever. It's me attempting to reach a goal. If I do...if I do...when I do.

So, the 160s are mine...but I paid a dear cost to get them. I acquired strep throat again and, of course, you can't eat when your throat feels like you've been practicing sword swallowing. TOM also appeared, so it's doubly hard to tell if I made it on my own or through water-weight loss. TOM is so dang cruel to me when it comes to water. I hold onto it for dear life...not because I want to, of course.

I had almost completed a full week of workouts when the throat-closing-up thing started last Thursday afternoon (see my other post for the details of the sickness and it's progression). I'm glad that I'm feeling better now and I'm actually looking forward to working out. Hubby says I could try it tomorrow...gently. What does that mean? Fifteen rather than thirty minutes or half the regular weights I use? Oh, well. I guess I'll just listen to my body and try not to push it.

I'll post that wonderful number here (168), but the true weigh day is tomorrow. I hope the 160s are still with me tomorrow as well. I may very well strut in here with my fab shoes.

I've been hitting the workout out videos hard, as of late (the Firm Standing Legs and Upper Body, mostly). Not much change in my weight, but plenty of changes in my body. I know you're supposed to be pleased with body changes, but I'd really like that number to go down much further. Hubby says 80% of it is diet. I guess I'd better start tweaking that...and for me, that means eating more and more often (perish the thought!).

I am always transfixed by the statement above. A video instructor is huffing through the last set or the last few reps and exclaims, "You're almost there!" as if that's going to make getting through those last delt flies, squats or crunches any easier or faster. I suppose it helps some and there's the encouragement that you've nearly completed your exercises, I guess. I don't know. I'm still trying to figure that one out because I'm heading right into another set, just after I finish the ones that I'm "almost there." Can't they just say, "One more!" instead. (Oh, I guess they do say that.)

My water intake has been sporadic. Some days, I get in the whole 2.3 liters. Other days, it's half that or a third. I try to remember my L-Carnitine (which makes a huge difference) but I sometimes forget. I need a way to remember it, but I don't want to leave them here at work. I'm seriously in need of more. I guess when I buy more, I won't be so hesitant in leaving them here in the office where I can see them.

The goal shoes seem so far off, again. I'm not even bordering the 160s. I fluctuate now between 173, 173.5 and 174...depending on my water intake, the salt intake, what sort of workout I've done, etc.... I'm just not ready to start eating oatmeal, egg whites and tuna like it's going out of style. I suppose I better get ready, if I want to see the changes I'm after. I know I'm taking in way too much salt. Mostly because of the instant meals I eat for lunch and all of the prepackaged food we have. Gotta go natural. That's what my mother has done (although she's not inhaling egg whites or oatmeal) and she's down to a size four! Maybe I'll do a variation on what she's doing. She's eating lots of raw veggies (which I like), fruit (depends on what type) and very little bread (again, perish the thought). I'll keep working on it and maybe, just maybe I'll make a dent in those 160's yet!

I'm working at this early hour thinking that I'll journey downstairs to the elliptical trainer because...I'm just so close! I keep seeing that box of shoes. The next goal item, tempting and taunting me. "Wear me! Oh, please wear me!" It would be awesome to show up to meet my newly found, old friend wearing those heels to lunch. Can I do it? Oh, the sheer joy of strutting in with my newly found 160s body in those fabulous heels. Not that I'm trying to get with her, but the last time she saw me, I was quite the chuboid.

So, cold in the coughing stages, but pretty much out of the congestion stage. Should I do it? Should I bite the bullet and just get on that thing and burn through the last four days of non-exercising? I really, really want to. I was checking out my calorie intake versus weight with the journal I keep and I definitely see improvements during the weeks I work out. That's to be expected, I suppose. I just want more improvements...and I want them faster, dammit! Patience, Enchantress. Patience.

Oh, but the shoes. Then, there are the other goals. I've also started thinking a little bit ahead. What if I surpass the first goal and continue to drop? Do I set up more goal items, or consider the added drops just sugar-free icing on the cake? Perhaps those additional drops would mean a new wardrobe? I don't know. I won't count my chickens...especially with the holiday season fast approaching. My mother's cornbread dressing calling my name at 11:30 at night? I hope I can be strong, this year. That's always the hope. I don't dare say I won't indulge, but perhaps I can work in more workout time to compensate. For you see, there is actually a bigger goal at hand. I hesitate to mention it now, but I will soon.

I'm really happy about today's number (173.5) even though it's not as dramatic as I would have liked it to be this week. Still, I can't complain. I've been battling a cold which left me on the couch at home yesterday. I haven't worked out all week! Do I miss it? But of course! I have reached that point very early in my training. I want to try and do something this afternoon, but I have a feeling my hubby will have none of it. I can hear him now;

"You'll just set yourself even further back if you try to work out without healing."

He's probably right, but I know with each ab workout and elliptical training I miss, it's just that much harder to get back into it. I want this 170s behind me once and for all. Figure training will come after I've restablished my initial strength and hubby is too excited. He's ready to whip me into shape (so he says). What kind of whipping he has in mind, only time will tell. I know that I'm already looking and feeling better. The added weight training will be an added bonus. It will be interesting to see how far I can go. Will/Can I look like a figure competitor before it's all said and done? Even if I don't compete, to just look like one of those lovely ladies would be a dream!

For the first time in months, I can change the number on the left. I'm glad about it, but I'm much more eager to change all the digits rather than just one.

A while back, I posted about not being able to drink the generic version of Crystal Light, sold at Wal-Mart. It contains Magnesium Oxide and I determined that it made me break out in horrible hives (the scars of which are still visible). It also made me loose my ability to taste. I guess I'm destined to be rid of the ability to enjoy food no matter what water additive I drink.

I discovered the Lipton Green Tea on the go and really started digging it. It has caffeine, so I paced myself and made sure not to drink it too late. All was going fine until a couple of weeks ago, when I thought I'd acquired a nasty case of food poisoning. Turns out, it's the dang tea! It gives me the runny runs if I drink it now (I know, TMI). What the hell? I'm not talking about a loosening or anything resembling a mild diuretic, I'm talking about straight-up water from the bum. It's not good...not good at all. So, I've made a decision. There are going to be to days when I just suffer through and deal with it. Why? Because for 1., it's hard trying to get just straight, plain, boring old water down the gullet, 2., buying flavored water is way too expensive, unless I catch a sale, then I'll consider it and, 3., everyone needs a thorough cleaning every now and again. It's not nice, but it's tolerable.

Sound crazy? It probably is and I may change my mind about all of it in the coming weeks. I may start dropping peppermints in my water again and call it good. That was decent, but it wasn't Mandarin Orange flavored green tea.

I really haven't looked as hard as I was looking before, but I will. The weekend is nearly here! I felt guilty about overindulging on some honey-roasted cashews I had, once I came home from work. Hubby was eating them like candy, so why couldn't I? You can't because you don't burn 2000 calories a day like he does. Oh yeah!

Well, the guilt was enough to send me downstairs to the elliptical trainer. It was my off day, but I wanted that extra 440 calories gone to compensate for the splurge. It didn't help. This morning I got up and stepped on the scale? Unfortunately the 175 told me that the water is hanging on. Why must you hang on, water? Get thee hence, retched fluid retention!

Well, I won't let it bother me. I'll keep pressing forward as I've been doing. It may be more than TOM, too. I made spaghetti for dinner on Tuesday night with mushrooms, ground turkey and Prego mushroom garden sauce (salt, salt, salt). Then yesterday afternoon, I went to lunch with girlfriends. Where did they want to go? Italian Village. What did I order? Spaghetti with marinara sauce (more salt). Last night, there were the pot stickers and rice. This morning, breakfast ham, scrambled eggs, whole wheat toast with jam. For lunch, szechuan noodles. Perhaps I'll have some food with my salt tonight. Oh, and the water drinking is not where it was. Gotta work on that. Perhaps if I did, the salt would leave. Capital idea, my good woman. Capital!

I can't find my Tape 4 of the Classic Firm series. Actually, I do have it on DVD now, but I can't find that sucker anywhere! It was something I wanted to add to my rotation this week and it appears to have vanished into thin air. Now, of course I know (logically) that it hasn't, but I can't put my hands on it to save my life. I'd like to use it to get my arms into better shape (as well as the rest of me) but more importantly, my wings. Yes. I have wings.

They haven't started flapping in the wind yet, but they're getting close. I've begun to notice the weight change now and, "Last hired, first fired," the evidence is in my wings. It's the last place I put on weight, so it's the first place (aside from my face) where I see changes. Since I'm not toning very much in that area yet, the result? Wings. Imagine your biceps as tires and the air is slowing being let out. Not pretty.

If I had that tape, I could get in the quality reps. Yes, I could do this without the tape, but the tape is regimented. I'm more likely to follow the instructions laid out in front of me, then to "wing" it and do things on my own. The good news is that I did get my elliptical workout in this morning and used the arm "thingies", which I normally don't (my stamina hasn't built up enough to use them continuously yet). I'm sitting at 174.5 and hope that the decrease continues as nicely as it has been these past few weeks. We'll see.

I went back through my blog posts, which is always an enlightening experience. It's funny to see me getting up in arms about being in the 160s and plateauing there. Man, those were the days. I'm hanging in the mid 170s and the high 160s sounds absolutely dreamy to me.

I'm working out regularly now (I even got in an elliptical training session yesterday). Sunday is my day off, but I'm actually missing the workout/toning sessions. I hope it's all working. I think I'm starting to see and feel a difference in my body. They're aren't mind altering changes yet but, it's better. If I can just make it through the holidays, I'll consider it a huge accomplishment. Haven't weighed this morning yet but, I was 175 yesterday. Oh to be petite again!

Gotta go get ready for church, now. I moved a lot of my winter clothes up last weekend and took my summer and spring duds downstairs. The closet is blocked so, I wasn't able to bring up all my winter dresses. I hope I can find something this morning that's appropriate for 40 degree temps. It's crazy how fast the temperatures changed but I'm certainly not complaining. I'll save my complaining for January and February when I've had above and beyond my share of the inversion and cold temps.

It was a refreshing, albeit difficult change from the treadmill (I talk as if I've been doing the treadmill thing for months instead of just twice). The refreshing part was seeing me click over 200 calories after only 15 minutes. I mean I literally burned twice as many calories in half the time. Imagine when I can stay on for 45 minutes or even an hour again! I was sort of calculating while I was standing on the scale this morning; if I could somehow get in two, elliptical sessions of thirty minutes per day, I would burn around 800 extra calories. The weight would just fall off! Now, I understand why I got so fit so fast the last time. I would do a morning workout (if I could get one in), then 30 minutes on the elliptical at lunch, then (if I was motivated and had time) a half hour or so on the treadmill in the evening. And, if hubby pissed me off in the wee hours, I would burn of my stress at 12:00 or 1:00 in the morning on the treadmill again. Now, we have this elliptical we didn't have back then...I would so be a skinny-Minny!

I couldn't possibly do this now, with the way everything is set up. Well, I guess I could...but do I really want to? Indy is still so young and is so needy and clingy sometimes. Besides, I like that she needs me right now. Later on, she won't want to have anything to do with me. Better enjoy it now. The set up would be to bring both girls downstairs and have them watch Elmo (or whatever) in the spare bedroom next door. I just have this feeling that if Indy knows I'm next door and wants me, she'll cry at the door for me and I couldn't just leave her out there to cry. Big sis can only do so much to keep her happy. However, if she's content to watch Elmo (or whatever) in the bedroom for at least 30 minutes without problem, there's my workout! Maybe I'll give it a shot and see what happens. Worse case scenario is she pulls me off before I've had enough time and I miss an extra workout for the day. Not a big loss I'd say since I already got one in this morning.

From my other blog and its post of the same title, you will learn of my exploits with 10-month pancake batter; however, I will not go into all the gory details on this blog. Instead, I will share my great initiatives in the workout world. Last week, I completed Buns, Hips and Thighs a total of two times and worked in a treadmill walk for 30 minutes. Awesome! Did sickness get me down? Hell, nah! I was back at it this morning (tummy pangs and all) on the treadmill for 30 minutes. I've been inspired and I'm not sure where it came from...but I'm certainly not complaining.

It was quicker to walk today, since I realized that I could play my Golden Girls DVDs on the computer and watch them there while I walked. Actually, I discovered it on my last walk as I listened to my aerobics music and looked up to realize the computer was there. Light bulb! "I can play my DVDs in the computer." I know...I'm so ready for rocket science.

Today's weight of 176 most likely is a result of all the water I lost this weekend from the illness but I'm hoping the exercise helped, too. Gotta look good in my catsuit at the end of the month, right? Can't look like Ms. Piggy in a catsuit...or can I?

I was doing so well before my trip to the south then...crash! Backyard Burgers, Captain D's, O'Charley's, Logan's, Fat Mo's, McDonald's, you name it. Four pounds later...seriously, I thought it would be much worse than this, but four is still bad. Luckily, one has already disappeared and I hope to never hear from him again.

Yesterday, I started working out again with a fierceness! First thing in the morning, I popped in one of my tried and trues; The Firm Parts: Sculpted Buns, Hips and Thighs with instructor, Tracy Long. She kicked my butt (well actually, she kicked my stomach and more specifically my abs). Ugh! I was feeling it a bit last night, but I'm in agony today. I must be a bit masochistic because I'm actually enjoying it. Well, not the pain so much but the fact that I did something good for my body. Something it hasn't had to do in a while and my body is letting me know, which is definitely a step forward.

So today, I'm going to attempt more working out...not sure what, not sure when but I'm going to try. That's all I can do is give it my best effort with each day. My costume came and it's definitely not meant for a tub-O so, I've got to get cracking on tightening up. I'm wearing it no matter what. The question is, will I be comfortable in it or royally embarrassed?

I'm going to loose my mind if the number doesn't change soon. Granted, I'm not working out like I should but, I'm not eating everything in sight either. In fact, I'm staying around 1300 or so calories a day. I don't think I'm in starvation mode, but maybe that's what's happening. I've got to up the anti on my workouts. They are few and far between. Looks like I answered my own questions.

What's the number you ask? 176. It hasn't really changed in days...days, I tell you! A 175 or even 174 would make me happy right about now. Truth be told, I'm just over the 170s altogether. So, 160s, where are you?

Today, for example, I had a protein packed breakfast: scrambled eggs (no grease), 2 strips of thinly sliced bacon and 1 slice of whole wheat toast (no butter) strawberry preserves. Usually, I eat a bowl of raisin bran and another after work that definitely keeps things moving along), but I didn't have time after getting the kids ready and off to school.

For lunch, it was a day out with my coworkers and we ate at a Thai restaurant. I tried something new, the Pra Ram (which was divine!); steamed veggies, tofu and peanut sauce with a few peanut chunks sprinkled on top. It came with a small serving of white rice and a small side salad. For dinner, I'm not sure what I'll have but this is where I start thinking; Damn, I wish I'd gotten a workout in this morning. Then, I wouldn't feel so guilty about the dinner; however, dinner is usually a lite fare. My intentions are good, but there's no follow-through. I've thought about how nice the weather has been and how a walk at the park would certainly help things along. I could do that tonight. I really could! Last night was Gymnastics night and tomorrow night is dance night. Thursday, Friday and Saturday would also work. What is my problem?

Okay. My plan: To walk to the park and walk the track with the Babe and Indy. I don't have to go at a full trot, but a good pace would be great. Two or three times would definitely get the heart rate going and the blood pumping. Following through? Well, we'll see.

So, I took a few shots of my fabulous shoes, which arrived today. Forgive the trouser socks and the night gown...even still, I think they're hot!

I found a someone who has my shoes. Woohoo! Now, being that it is an auction site, let's hope I get them. I'm not waiting around like I did last time, only to find that the beautiful pair of shoes I want has disappeared, never to be seen again. Okay, I did find them...just on the designer's site for more than I'd like to pay.

So, here I am at 176 nearly back to where I was before the "lummox" arrived at my house (that's almost 20 pounds lost since the new year, for those keeping up). At least I didn't creep back into the 190's (heaven forbid). If I can at least broach the 160's before my trip, I can get/wear my fabulous shoes. Even though the weight is coming off, I'm not happy with my body shape and need to get back into the workouts. I know that walking, running, jumping, skipping, skating, swimming, anything is going to make this body right as rain again. I did a Leslie Sansone walk last week, but nothing has happened yet this week. I'm hopeful. The basement move is looking more promising with each day (I assembled the new office desk and put the desktop computer back together over the weekend). That in itself was a bit of a workout. My butt was so sore the next day!

If my babe's behavior keeps up, I may take her (and myself) skating later this week. I would much rather go and be free to skate. The issue is Indy; I usually have to push her in the stroller as I travel around the rink which makes my skill development of the sport nearly impossible and my back feel like I'm preggers all over again. Hubby doesn't skate and doesn't want to spend the hour or two traveling around the games area with the babe (I don't blame him). I don't dare have big sis push her around the rink. She really doesn't have the strength. Oh, well. I guess I'm stuck, but at least the babe will enjoy herself.

We had the Babe's birthday party and a host of other birthday exploits last weekend. Of course, we ate ourselves into oblivion, but I didn't do as much damage as I thought. Now, TOM is on the way and I'm feeling uber bloated. Oh, well. I'm still on the path and I'm slowly working in activity (walks with the kids, mostly). I hope to be back in full aerobic swing, soon. The basement is almost done. Then, we can take our poor treadmill and eliptical trainer out of dust and mothbolls. They really need a workout themselves.

Phew! I must really be determined. I'm down to a lovely 179 today. Can you believe it? The workouts haven't even kicked into full effect yet. This is strictly me taking control of my portions again. I must have been eating like a damn pig! Well, I've experienced a few hunger pangs, but not many (in fact, I'm thinking it's almost time for my light popcorn). Hubby wanted to go to the park for a stroll, but we ended up hanging out at the house watching his burned copy of 300 until it started freaking out on us and completely stopped playing. Nice.

In other news, here are my goal shoes again. They are located on the designer's site for many dollars more than I want to pay but, oh! They are truly what I want. I also purchased a cute little baby doll top for my trip South next month. It's one of those that could double as a dress, but we'll see how it looks when I try it on (probably in the next couple of weeks).

Fast forward two hours...

Eating my popcorn now...I've got the jitters. Could be the Lipton Instant White Tea I've been inhaling for the past little while. Caffeine and I are just not friends.

It's a new day and I'm trying to get back on track. The lummox is out of my house, the basement is almost done and I'll soon have the treadmill and elliptical trainer at my disposal again. I'm looking forward to it...sort of. Let's say that I'm looking forward to getting back into shape and fitting into my clothes properly again. I'm only up about five pounds and I can tell. When I look at my face in the mirror, or when I try to put on some form fitting items? My ass is spreading again and I don't like it. Today, I plan to do a little something (start off slow) and take it from there. I'm currently sitting at 181 and after the summer I've had, I'm surprised it's not more than that.

Goals are still in place, I think. Unfortunately, the shoes I want are no longer available on the discount site and I'm not sure I'm willing to pay over $40.00 for them (when the time comes).

That pesky 7 pounds I picked up while on those god-forsaken 'roids is nearly gone. Now, if I could just motivate myself to work out regularly again. Not to say that I'm not getting in exercise (lots of walking dogs to the park and walking kids to the park and around the track) but aerobics is nearly non-existent. I decided to try and "wake things up" by walking down and walking back up all 8 flights of stairs in our building. Well, it's more like 16 because there's a set on each side before you reach the actual floor. My legs will be screaming tomorrow. Really...it doesn't feel like I did anything right now, but I always feel like I've been doing super squats the day after walking our stairs (which is why I don't do this often). My legs need not be any bigger than they already are. I build muscle mass quickly.

I'll be back on the wonder woman/New Dawn site soon to post. RN_Buffoon has bestowed me with an award and, of course, I've got to get to the podium and give my speech. Soon...

Will it be the new outfit or the fetching piece of jewelry? I'll be checking around to see later this morning. Today's number? Oh, 174 and that means 20 pounds gone since January. Woohoo! My mom informed me that she's now in the 150s (she's on this trek, too). She's got five more inches on her height than me, so she's really looking slim. I believe that's 20 pounds for her as well. She's dug out all of her tens and says she's nearly in her eights (Eights? that'll be the day). ;) I'm currently in a very comfortable, loose 12 but I have yet to try on any of my tens. My mediums fit pretty well and my arms don't look as if they'll burst through like a Hulk episode.

I'm motivated and eager to see where I go. My downfall always seems to be holiday meals and fall warm-up foods. I get to around 160 and sabotage myself during these times. If I can just control it, who knows where I'll end up. Here's to hoping.

I'm sporting 176.5 pounds todays, ladies and gentleman. Granted, some of that weight loss was the result of my contracting a contagious disease that rendered me unable to eat for two days, but whatever, the number is kind. I'm hoping that in the next few weeks, I can be placing my order for those fabulous shoes. I'm too excited! Okay, calm down. Don't want to have set-backs...gotta stay focused. I haven't checked to see if I made any further goals because I'm looking at a future prize. I'll do that later this morning and report back.

(I checked. Close, but no dice. Two more pounds till I've achieved 20 pounds off. Haven't even worked out this week, yet. Ugh! Better get on it.) 04/19/07 5:45am

The number today sat at 180.5, which I suppose is realistic, now that I'm feeling better and eating a regular diet again. Oh, but those 170's sure felt good. I'm sure I'm only a day or two away from really being there. It still sort of bums me out that I have to document it.

Today is a workout day, but I haven't been sleeping very well, so I hope to get in a workout this afternoon. Traffic was monstrous, yesterday. In fact, it took me thirty minutes just to get 10 miles out of the city. That's insane! I ended up going to my mother's as sort of a pit stop. I couldn't bare to sit in traffic anymore.

I didn't mention that I went to my water aerobics class last Friday. Our teacher said, "Good to have you back." Hmm. I wonder if she meant it? We had pool noodles that were shaped like "U's" and we had to stand on them, at one point (in the deep end). For those who don't know how water aerobics works, you were a huge belt around your midriff that acts as a floatation device. That way, you can use the resistance in the deep end without drowning. I gotta tell yeah...sometimes I'd much rather be without that blasted belt. It's so cumbersome! It's always riding up under my chest, no matter how tight or loose I leave it.

So, back to the pool noodles. I was trying...desperately to stand on mine, but it kept popping up and I looked absolutely ridiculous. Everyone else seemed to have no problem. Then, we did something else with them for a bit. By the time we went back to standing on them, everyone was having issues. I'm glad I'm not the only one who suffered from lack of coordination with the noodles.

I felt great, at class end and look forward to the next one. It was nice leaving the building with the sun still shining. That's new for me.

The Water has left and the Fat is leaving behind it. Keep moving. Don't stop. Just keep marching because I don't want to see you again (well, Water I know, he can't help himself. He'll be back when TOM returns. But Fat, you're ass is outta here!). The magic number 178.5 means that I am no longer in the 180s and, hopefully, won't return. I am too thrilled! It also means I've hit another goal. With 16 pounds gone, I am now ready for my masseuse. I may wait, like hubby suggested, and do the nails and back rub while we're on vacation; however, as I think about it more, how fabulous would it be to have my nails done and prettied up before I leave and my back all worked out and wonderful to get the vacation started off right? I'll ponder a bit longer on it.

To celebrate that fabulousness that is me today, I am wearing a sun dress (in size medium, thank you very much). It's a red maxi (going down to nearly my ankles) with subtle black floral patterns all over, off-the-shoulder in a sweet chiffon. The shoes? Red mules that are showing off my painted red toes that are too hot! I've gotten lots of compliments on my outfit today and have been told, "You look too good for work." I should just leave, right? If only I had a date.

Well, I weighed today. I know it's not Wednesday; however, TOM is almost gone and I feel the water weight leaving. The number on the scale was kind 182.5 thank goodness. It's a small change, but a change nonetheless. I'm still achy and coughing. The doctor's appointment is this morning, shortly after I take the babe to school. I'll actually see the doctor and not the nurse practitioner, which I hope makes a difference.

I didn't eat much at all yesterday and I doubt I'll have much of an appetite today. We did go out for lunch and ate at Paradise Bakery (my friends are obsessed with that place. I personally think they charge to damn much for their sandwiches and soups but, whatever). I had their Paradise Pasta salad and their Turkey noodle soup. It was okay, but I think I would have preferred something a little more spicy. My other choices were tomato soup covered in sour cream or Turkey Broccoli. Neither sounded appealing to me.

We received a bit of rain last night which supposedly cleaned out the air. I'm glad. I hope it helps me with my healing process. Can I just say it again, I am so frustrated with being ill. I just want to feel like me. It seems that I'm asking for way to much.

It's frustrating as hell and there's really nothing I can do about it accept wait. I'm tempted to see what the number shows, once TOM disappears finally. I can feel the water trapped in my body...seriously. It's hanging around my hips, thighs, back and face. Then, as if all that weren't enough, I appear to be sick again...AGAIN! What is up with this winter? I haven't been this sick in years and it's been continuous. I think this is a cold, but who knows. Thank God I still have some of the decongestant prescribed when I had the sinus infection. I'll be taking that over the next few days for sure. The weather man said we had some of the dirtiest air quality in the country, yesterday. I'm sure that's not helping me and my kids get any better.

I still haven't rewarded myself for the last goal. There just hasn't been time. I really don't want to get my manicure/pedicure with the two kids in tow because 1, the baby shouldn't be around the smell of those chemicals and 2, the babe would be begging for one of her own. I may treat her to something like that later in the year, but not just yet. She still sucks her thumb and treats like nail polish and manicures should be saved for non-thumb suckers.

The good news out of all this is I'm looking better, so the muscle building must be happening. I'm supposed to go to lunch with a coworker today (we haven't decided where). I don't have much of an appetite and when I take that medicine, it may disappear completely. I should be able to order safely without fear of overdoing anything. I also have a lunch tomorrow for a coworker who is turning 31. I'm a little torn as to whether we should pay for his lunch or not. I usually start that ball rolling (taking the birthday person's check, then chipping in the first few dollars), but for my birthday lunch, I had to pay for my own. I was a little perturbed by this but, whatever. Perhaps that is what we're doing, now. I'll just follow everyone elses lead.

Sometimes, these are things you would rather not hear. Other times, it's exactly what you need to keep motivated. Personal comments in the form of a compliment. I love them!

A coworker of mine told me, "What are you doing? You're looking so great. You're getting into such good shape."

Oh, yeah! Exactly what I needed to hear. Even though I'm not quite to the halfway mark, it made me feel like my efforts were not in vain. I'll keep trucking along until more and more personal comments are shot my way and more of my clothes begin to fit again.

The weekend weather is supposed to be decent, so I may begin changing clothes out. I really need to. There are still maternity objects hanging next to shirts, dresses and pants that are very wintry and probably won't be worn again anytime soon. I'm sure I got them out last year when I thought I'd drop tons of weight, after the baby was born. It didn't happen. Hormones are a bitch, but thank God they don't stick around forever.

Last night, it was "Hooked on Aerobics" again, but this time, the babe didn't want to work out with me. She started to, then changed her mind. I guess that whole being sweaty thing was getting to her (poor kid, she just doesn't know what she's in for). :) I felt really good afterwards. I showered, got the girls their dinner, then I had mine. Lentil soup and bran cereal should have had me living in the bathroom, but I'm fine even now. I guess my body is adjusting to all the fiber I'm getting. I'm glad. No one likes to live in the potty.

Hubby said that I'm starting to sound differently when I sleep. My body is looking different, too. Woohoo! It's all about those personal comments.

The weight stayed the same at 183.5, which is better than I thought it would be (I mean, serious water weight happening). My intentions were to get up and work out this morning, but I overslept. The reason? We finished watching the Prestige, which was an amazing movie and worth every minute of sleep I lost. Oh, well. Maybe the babe and I can workout again together. Hubby's been going to the gym in the evenings, which leaves us to our own devices for a couple of hours. Or, we could go for a walk if the weather allows. We'll see.

By the way, if you're interested in a place (site) that helps you maintain your information virtually, rather than by paper or some makeshift spreadsheet, try www.dailyplate.com. The basic account is free. If you choose a gold membership with additional features, it's something like $30.00 for 6 months than $40 something for a year. Not a commercial by any means, but a pretty good site if you're looking for one.

After the doctor's visit, prescription filling and dental visit, I came home ready to workout. A little strange for me, since I'm not usually excited about working out in the evening, but since I'd missed it in the morning, I thought I'd better get to it. The babe wanted to participate with me, so when I grabbed my weights, she grabbed hers. We rolled out the mat and started the tape. She did pretty well for someone who has never seen the routine before. By the second round of aerobics (this is a 45 minute aerobic and weight training video pictured here), she was sweating too, and made sure to comment about it.

By the last ten minutes, she was pretty much done while I pounded through the difficult, non-stop abdominal routine. Ouch! As I watched myself reflected in the stereo glass, I'm really not happy with the state my arms are in. Oh, I understand that it's a slow process. The fat loss coupled with the toning will do the trick, but until then, my arms are looking flabby and unattractive. It's no wonder my blouses don't fit well in the arms. Not cute.

Today, I have a lunch date with a friend and I need to investigate what the better choices are, in terms of what to eat there. I do have a couple of staples I like that I don't think are too fattening, but then, you think they're not until you research and find out the "light" sauce they use has 45 fat grams.

TOM is on the way and I feel the water weight being held hostage in my body. I'm not expecting miracles with tomorrow's number but, I do hope the gain (if any) I show is only a couple of pounds (all water). I've been sucking down the salt like you wouldn't believe! For Lent, I'm giving up all forms of chocolate (including the dark pieces I have occasionally as a treat). I'll have to find a new treat until Easter, I guess. Already I've almost slipped twice and without even realizing it! I've given up chocolate before, but this time (with it's strange, seductive hold on me), I have a feeling it will be much more difficult.

I woke up raring to go for my workout on Saturday, since I again missed Water Aerobics class (taxes...fun, fun, fun). I got my sweat-on to FitPrime's Floor Burn with Susan Harris (the picture is of a different FitPrime video which I hope to acquire. I couldn't find a picture of Susan's). My abs were killing me on Sunday...similarly to how I felt a few days after my C-section. Coughing was painful, so I tried to sissyfy my coughs to avoid pain.

The leg portion of the workout didn't seem to have the same effect, which tells me it either wasn't that great or that my legs are in better shape than I thought. I knew my abs were in sad shape (and still are) so, I've got to make sure to work in more workouts that target my abs. It will be better for me in the long run and a quicker road to having a waist again. The plan was to workout with one of the Firm classics but, if you check out today's post on my other site, you'll understand why I didn't have the energy or motivation to do it...despite waking up to the alarm on time an everything. I can't say that I'll get it in later...I'm not sure. I just hope that the news I receive today will make life feel a little better.

It's official! I'm more than ten pounds down and on my next reward. Woohoo! The scale was kind at 183.5, but not as kind as it was the other day (I sort of figured that would happen). I'm not upset, though. It's my own fault for weighing too early. Consistency is the key.

Due to "extracurricular activities" last night, I slept in and missed my workout time this morning. Ugh! Gotta make it up. I told hubby that he would have to watch the kids and he was like, "Okay." I'm definitely going to hold him to it. Now, let's pray I have the energy to get in a workout this afternoon.

I'm feeling really good! It's nice to be able to breath and hold a conversation without hacking to death. I also like that my energy level has returned and I'm feeling more like me. Sometimes, you really don't realize how sick you are until you get well. I must have been at death's door!

Three more days until water aerobics. I wonder if my instructor missed seeing my chocolate face in the sea of cookie dough? During the class we had at the first part of February, the music was really loud; however, I noticed all the songs were Cher tunes. Every single song...from her 60's boho days to the present. The next week, it was all dance music. I'm not sure if they have a sound system somewhere with someone running the music or if they just stick a disc in a player and call it good. I think it makes a difference on the attitude and enjoyment of the class if the music is or isn't good. For me, the Cher class was pretty awesome.

I've got to learn how to use the DVD burner my mother gave us. I've got all this stuff on video that I want to convert, the tools to do it, but not the knowledge. I keep thinking, "This weekend, I'll convert my tape of "Hooked" episodes. That'll be a good starter project." Then, I don't and I'm back to using the tape which looses more and more clarity definition with each use. I've really got to do this.

I weighed this morning. I know, I know. Only Wednesdays, but I had to know. I was feeling a bit lighter and thought I'd check it out. I would never have guessed the number in a million years! I'm hitting 181.5 this morning. Was it the removal of all that excess hair or really fat loss that's occurred? Whatever it is, it's the smallest I've been since having had Indy. Woohoo! I'm totally stoked. I hope that now that I'm feeling better and can get in those extra workouts (one being today), I'll really start to see it fall off.

Due to my husbands strange sleeping habits, I wasn't able to go to my water aerobics class on Friday and I was really bummed out about it. So, Saturday (bright and early) I got "Hooked" and felt truly invigorated afterwards. I didn't eat much Saturday or Sunday (the decongestant I'm on really zaps my appetite) so, I've eaten purely for nourishment, not for taste. It must have helped because, dig that number above! This also means I've hit a goal (if I can stay within a three to four pound radius of that number by Wednesday). I hope to find a place that can give me a nice manicure without breaking the bank. It might be that I have to breakdown and go to my place at the mall, but that's okay. I'll make up for the cheap price by getting some sweet spring decals or something extra special like airbrushing.

Next goal? Oh, man! I'm ready. Bring on the massage!

So, it's been nearly three and a half weeks (I think) since I first started posting about the cruds. Enough is enough and I'm off to the doctor's for my appointment this morning at 10:10am. I am so ready to have somebody help me, now. I'm tired of coughing, sore throats, congestion, sinus pressure, sleepless nights and lack of consistent exercise. It's the lack of exercise that has the weight coming off a lot more slowly than I'd like (but still at a healthy rate, at least).

I'm down to 185.5 today and that's a 2.5 pound loss since last week. I can only guess that the walking around downtown last week and the boot camp made a difference. If it can do that, imagine what consistent aerobics could do! I'm psyched. Come on, body. It's time to heal already. I command you to heal! (slipping off into Jimmy Swaggart, Pat Robertson, Jim Baker, pick your favorite evangelist-speak).

One and a half pounds to next goal. Woohoo! I hope I even had the funds to schedule my "spa" manicure when it's time. Do you think hubby would spot me the money if I need it? Yeah, me too.

An observation and completely off topic: Gwen Stefani's legs are amazing! I hear she's a roller skater and swimmer...that would definitely make them tone and fabulous. She's average height (5'6) but with the four inch heels she usually sports, that would put her at 6 feet, giving her that amazon look. You're my leg inspiration, Gwen!

If only I could swim everyday...I think I'd be the happiest girl in the world. Leaving my boot camp class on Fridays, I'm always sad to get out of the water. I love it that much! Despite the yelling, pushing, being exhausted and out of breath, I absolutely love that water. I'm still dealing with the cruds (if you can believe it) and now have a stopped up nose that runs. What the hell is that about? Anyway, I asked hubby in spite of my nose, if he'd be up to swimming today. He said he'd think about it. I always go by myself, why can't we all go this time?

I'll weigh on Wednesday, but I'm scared of the number. We ate out on Saturday and I wasn't exactly great in my choices. Granted, I didn't go completely overboard, but I did get more than I would have normally. I was at a buffet, after all. I wanted to feel like we were getting our money's worth, at least. Sunday was a little better, but I still splurged. Today, I'm back on track. I'm more afraid of the number because of the lack of exercise. I miss it, but don't dare jump back into while I'm still gross like this...or should I? I've been trying to walk whenever possible. I park further away and then we did a bit of walking downtown, last week. Will all that help? I certainly hope so.

The next goal is a pedicure or manicure. Hmm. What to choose? (That is, if I've even gotten close enough to think about it, at this point). If it was closer to spring, I'd go for the pedicure for sandals and such. It's not warm enough for sandals yet, so I guess I'll have no choice but to do the manicure. My hands are out there all the time. I will be sure to go to a spa to have it done. I can go to the mall or one of those quickie shops anytime. It is a reward, after all. I hope I get there sooner rather than later.

Oh! A nice thing, though. Someone who hasn't seen me in a while said I looked like I'd lost weight when she saw me last week. That was nice. I can't wait till everyone notices and I get my waistline back. Ah, a waistline!

I really am going to go, despite the still lingering sore throat and despite the constant hacks. I can't afford not to! I haven' t really worked out all week, well, unless you count my parading all around downtown, yesterday. We have a conference in session with lots of employees here from out of town. We were supposed to be at a hotel located just across from my parking destination. Turns out, a recently built facility bearing the same name was where I needed to be, not where I was.

So, off on a hike I went. It was only a few blocks, but you have to understand. Salt Lake City blocks are much larger than normal city blocks (it's historical...something about roads needing to be big enough and wide enough to turn oxen around or something like that). Anyway, they're pretty big and I huffed and puffed my way over. By the time I got there, I was glistening and I thought, "Wow. I guess I just got my workout in after all." I coughed a little bit, once I sat down but it wasn't too bad. I figure I'll be in warm water and all tonight not cool, brisk air.

I'm just so desperate to keep on track. Things are progressing well, clothes are looking better and baggier on me than they have in months. I keep seeing a pair of jeans in my closet that I'm desperate to wear. I won't be able to until I get this baby weight off once and for all.

Finally, V-day is nearly upon us and I have pretty much worn the same dress on V-day for the past seven or eight years (excluding the years preggers or with baby weight). I may actually get into it next week, if I stay on target. I think it would literally blow my hubby's mind to see me in it (it's a fabulous dress, even now). I never thought it too dressy, and would wear it on campus for the day. Now that I almost work in my pajamas, it will definitely cause a stir at work (that is, if I don't look like a beached whale in it). I'd like to wear and be able to feel somewhat confident...knowing that it could look better, but also realizing that it looks good regardless. Wish me luck!

Still struggling with illness and getting mighty frustrated about it. I cough, I wheeze, I breathe really hard. I run out of energy and think, "Lord, is this the end?" Why can't I get over this crap? I'm not sure if it's the inversion, my new regime or just the devil chasing after me. What gives? I just want to feel good and get back on track. It's not exactly easy trying to work out when you sound like you're going to cough up a lung with each lunge or pony-step.

I have stayed on track with my eating and have done a pretty good job of not deviating too far from the good. Saturday, we fried up chicken (but I fry in olive oil with my own, special recipe). The side item was organic shells and cheese and I only had one bread twist. I even made some very wise choices when we went out to lunch on Friday (Chinese):

Chicken and green beans
Lo mein
Steamed White Rice (substituted from Fried Rice)
Miso Soup

On my sick day home, I picked up a Slim Slam from Denny's:

2 hotcakes (no butter)
Skillet honey ham
Egg Beaters

It was delicious, without the 60 or some odd grams of fat a regular Slam carries. Yikes!
Today, I even weighed myself (despite my better judgement...ever since TOM arrived on Monday, I've felt like a beached whale. Guess what? It's not as bad as I would have guessed. I "clocked" in at 188.5 thank you very much. Is it wrong to pray that I'm carrying around five pounds of water or is that just wishful thinking?

...and it's manifesting itself in various sicknesses, I guess. I got over a cold, and now I seem to have another one. The humidifier is back on, the Vicks is front and center in the medicine cabinet again and I'm looking like something from a zombie movie. The good news? I weighed in yesterday at 188 and thought I would burst! It's a small victory, but a victory nonetheless. I reached a reward and placed my bid (since the item I want to purchase is much cheaper in the bidding field). One of my goal items may disappear from stock, so I'm vacillating over whether I should order them and maybe leave them with my mother until time or wait and try to order them when the time comes. I'll continue to vacillate.

I felt like garbage yesterday, but still got in a workout after work. I'm not sure if I'll be able to get one in today, but we'll see. The babe has dance tonight and I don't want to "cut it close" and make her late because of showering and getting dressed. Excuses? Yeah, I guess so. I'll try to work it in...um try harder than I would have when I said, "I'm not sure." :)

Anyway, I've got a cold or something and now this blasted pink eye (conjunctivitis). I'm doing the drops, then notice the babe's eye and mine look a lot a like. Yep. She's got it. Now, she's doing the drops and Indy's got the gunky eye thing going on. So, we're all doing the drops and I spent yesterday spraying every possible surface with disinfectant. If I wore make-up (which I don't) I would have to through out all the eye stuff and replace it with new. I suppose that would make a make-up wearer especially upset, since that stuff can be a pretty penny to purchase.

TOM is on the prowl and I notice I'm craving a lot of salt. I'm sure next week, my sweet tooth will want in on the action. I've done okay with staving off the cravings but it's still tough. I will probably allow myself a piece of dark chocolate here or there, but that's all. I'm on a roll and I don't want to derail my progress by giving into cravings. Self-sabotage is not on the agenda!

I did it! I went to my water aerobics class last night and do you know what? It was awesome...tough as hell, but awesome! I really didn't know what to expect because when I checked the class schedule the morning before I went, it was listed as Boot Camp. I called the center and asked, "So, is Boot Camp a water aerobics class?" Lauren (the kind lady on the other end), described it as a sort of circuit training but in a fast pace style like military boot camp. I was intrigued. I did a quick search on the Internet. Check out the video I found!

Evening arrived and I was dressed and ready to go. Out comes a woman who was large and in charge, but in excellent physical condition. She worked us over! Froggy jumps, cross-country, washing machines, push-ups, pull-ups, biceps, triceps, inner thighs, outer thighs. You name it, we worked on it...for one solid hour. Man, I felt like somebody had been sitting on me, by the time I came out of the water. I was even sweating (I really wasn't expecting that).

I came home and hubby had grilled chicken and tofu! A lovely wheat pasta salad, tossed with chicken and a healthy side of broccoli. It was delicious and I had to thank him again for coming up with the idea. It was the first time away from the kids in a while and time devoted completely to me. I know I said I wouldn't, but I did get on the scale this morning to see if things had improved. I'd say two pounds away (fat or water loss) is an improvement. I'm ready for next Friday. Bring it on!!

I decided to go to the water aerobics class tomorrow. I haven't worked out in almost two weeks and, breathing or not, I gotta at least try. I figure it's not going to have me panting like I would if I were doing kickboxing or something, but the toning that will begin is worth the little bit of hacking I may have to endure. I hope my bathing suit doesn't run and hide when it sees me coming.

Actually, I haven't purchased a new swimsuit in a couple of years. Maybe, if we're fortunate enough to go somewhere warm and inviting this year on our vacation (preferably with a beach), I can justify laying down a few clams for a new, sexy swimsuit. Gosh, how would it be to get into a bikini again? Even when I was looking good, I didn't dare. I've never had washboard abs or even a small belly. I've always had a ponch. I hope I can make the ponch go away for good, this time.

I was disappointed to see a one pound increase today. I know. I really shouldn't be weighing every day or even every other day. I've decided to go back to my once a week weigh in. I think that would be best, in terms of my sanity and my reward program. Wednesday it is! Oh, and the numbers are now accurate on the left.

The inversion has made it nearly impossible to get my workouts in and not in the way that one would normally think. Granted, the air quality is sucky, but that has nothing to do with the temperature controlled climate in my home. I also have a humidifier that helps things out. The problem is my incessant coughing, which requires NyQuil at night, which means I'm sleeping like a damn brick on Valium. I just lay there and the alarm sounds with no movement to snooze or anything for, what seems like, an eternity. I could workout in the evening, but that's usually when I feel the worse.

Excuses? Perhaps, but I'm not hacking to death for my health. That's just insane! I skated on Monday night and that was pretty good, but the coughing spell still came. I wonder if I'll have the same thing happen on Friday at the water aerobics class? Gosh, now that I think about it, I hope I don't look too terrible in my bathing suit. You know, it's one thing to workout with others in a regular aerobics class. You can wear sweatpants until your comfortable enough to wear shorts in public...but swimming suits? They don't make ankle length swimming suits...at least, not that I'm aware of.

The eating is still going quite well, however, and I've almost reached my first goal (5 pounds). I went back up slightly today when I stepped on the scale this morning. I know why: I didn't get in my total, 64 ounces of water yesterday. Man, the water thing is huge! If I'm not getting it in like I should, nothing happens. This was the first time since the weekend that I missed and I honestly would have gotten more in, had I not tried to hold off from drinking the last 32 till I got home. I'll seriously try not to do that again.

So, here are the goals and rewards. I hope I reach them quickly, but reaching them at all would be sweet bliss!

• 5lbs - A DVD from my wish list (UPDATE: Goal achieved 1/31/07 6lbs off [188]!)
• 10lbs- Manicure/pedicure (UPDATE: Goal achieved 2/21/07 10.5lbs off [183.5]!)
• 15lbs- Personal Massage (UPDATE: Goal achieved 3/14/07 16.5lbs off [177.5]!)
  
• 20lbs - a new outfit or a fetching piece of jewelry (UPDATE: Goal achieved while worrying about reaching shoe goal, around 11/03 20lbs off [174]!)
  
• 25lbs - a new pair of daring shoes from cutsieshoes (UPDATE: Goal achieved 11/13/07 25.5lbs off [168.5]!)
• 30lbs - an Alexis Vogel makeover and a night out-on-the-town with hubby

Yesterday, I took off from work. Indy had the sniffles and gave me whatever it was she was carrying. On top of that, we've got this nasty inversion hanging over our heads making everyone feel like crud. I was feeling like crap warmed over. Therefore, no working out for me. I'm feeling a bit guilty because I've only worked out once this week. I can say, however, that I've been staying true to the good eats and Sunday, I was down to 191. Thirty more pounds to go (ugh!). Feels like I'll never get there, but I've got to stay true...focused to the goal.

As a treat (that hasn't seemed to deter my progress), I've allowed myself dark chocolate pieces at night. Oh, ecstasy! There's nothing like the feeling you get when it melts in your mouth. Hubby and I are total addicts. I was blessing the Spaniards of old for their discovery of this delectable treat.

I hope to at least get my "one mile" video in today. We'll see what happens. That would alleviate some of this guilt. I guess the other thing I could do (since it's dance night) is find a nice enclosed area to take a walk in. I've got to take it easy, though because of my weakly lungs. I am so prone to bronchial trouble it's pitiful.

Glad the weekend is nearly here. My hubby is off from tomorrow till Monday...on day shift. Woohoo! Maybe he'll find time to sneak away into to town and come and see me. Wishful thinking yes but hey, it could happen.

I didn't work out this morning...not because I didn't get up in time. On the contrary! I stirred slightly before my alarm went off. I got up and starred at the clock. I felt a heaviness on my chest and an ache in my heart. Our neighbor, I found out last night, passed away. I wanted to cry yesterday, but couldn't muster the tears. Instead, I was moody and indifferent to my hubby and I separated myself from the family. We watched a movie together, but I just couldn't enjoy it fully. This morning, I fussed at my daughter about leaving home without her gloves. I was so irritated, I barely allowed the kiss goodbye (I know, so wrong).

After I pulled away from the school, I asked God to change my mood and lighten my heart. I couldn't' figure out why I was so aggravated. Then, I cried. I cried for his family. I cried for his daughter and the twin boys he's leaving behind. I cried for his girlfriend who may have become his wife in the future. I cried for all those people who loved him. Then, I cried because he was young and it could have been my hubby or me. He was 33 years old.

Tonight was to be the night I start my water aerobics. Hubby told me that they wouldn't be having the class because of something they were doing to the pool. If my mood wasn't in the state that it's in, I might actually be a bit disappointed but I honestly don't care. What I'm thinking about is his daughter who, when she's sixteen, will regale the story of her father to friends...her story will be riddled with memories her brothers will never know. When she eventually marries, he won't be there in his dress blues to walk her down the aisle. By the time she's thirty, will she have forgotten things? Probably. It makes me so sad.

So, perhaps I'll get a workout in this evening, after the viewing. I may need some sort of strenuous activity to get my mind off things. The eating is still going well and I still haven't weighed since Sunday (TOM is still around). My hope is to be at a round 190 by Sunday. We'll see.

As I posted the other day, I went through a Hooked routine and got an intense workout. Yesterday, it was the walk video and today, another Hooked routine. My calves were already sore, yesterday from the first Hooked workout (it's 80's, so it's they're workouts have more impact than the workouts of today). As long as you're not doing outrageous stretching or damaging your knees, these older workouts still have a lot to contribute. I mean, seriously. People were really fit in the 80's but I digress.

We were in training and the conference room we were in is two floors down from where my office is located. I ran up and down those steps about 6 times for various reasons. Now, my thighs are sore. This is me trying to work in extra activity where I can. It's easy to do, working in the activity, but it definitely shows you the truth of the shape your in.

I'm wearing a maternity top today, not because it fits me so perfectly, but because it's really quite nice looking. It's a bright pink with a long neckline and sharp, tapered cuffs. Hubby asked me this morning, as he was wishing me a happy anniversary, "What happened to your breasts?" I was like, "Huh?". The shirt, as I said, is maternity and emphasis is put around the mid section. My mid section, sans baby, is still a little round. Therefore, the horizontal pattern of the material makes the boobs look almost non existent. I think it threw him for a loop because I am quite chesty. I lifted my shirt to prove to him that I still had the goods and he seemed satisfied. Writing this now, I can't believe we even had this conversation.

We had the little one's birthday party last night and I indulged in one small piece of cake and one scoop of low-fat, Dreyers strawberry cheesecake ice cream. They were both delicious and just enough sweets to make me happy. The dinner consisted of sweet and sour chicken (which I had a bit of), chicken lo mein and Moo Goo Gai Pan. Yum! I actually loaded up on the veggies and felt really good. Lunch was brought in for our training and I had one serving of the pasta and filled the rest of my plate with salad. I'm doing well, folks. I'm doing well.

I won't weigh again until the weekend, though because TOM appeared on Tuesday (1/9/07). I'm bloated and, regardless of all the water I'm drinking, I know I'm holding on to a lot. I'd like to wait to weigh.

Yesterday morning, I tried Hooked on Aerobics for the first time in a long, long time. It was rough! I found myself transitioning down to the low effort, often. I was just huffing and puffing, but thankfully, staying within my target heart rate. With as difficult as it was, I felt really energized afterwards. It hit me while I was showering that it was the most energized I'd felt since beginning my program last week. It occurred to me that I probably haven't been reaching my target heart rate with the walking workouts...you know, not putting out enough effort to reach it regardless of the sweat I was seeing.

Today, I couldn't do Hooked because hubby was home and the only VCR that currently works resides in our bedroom (I fixed that this morning on my way to work by stopping at Wally World and picking up a new VCR to put in the living room). We needed one anyway. My mother gave us a DVD burner for Christmas and I want to convert home videos and such to DVD...but I digress. I took my walking DVD up front and went through the two-mile, thirty minute workout. This time, I put forth the effort and felt like I was really doing well. I also noticed how much better I did since last week. I guess I'm getting stronger. It's still a bit uncomfortable, but I did it. I can't way to say that about Hooked and The Firm. Then, I know I would be making huge leaps.

Here are my stats from yesterday: 72 ounces of water, 1380 calories, 41.5 fat grams and 35 grams of fiber. I'm not counting carbs or protein this time because I'm eating low glycemic items. Doing so, my carbs are under control and I'm getting a lot of protein. I really like this because I don't feel like I'm going to starve to death. That was always my issue before. I would just get so hungry and want to eat everything in site. I'd crave those high glycemic carbs which would only satisfy me temporarily. Then, I'd be hungry again. I've also noticed how even I am. No more highs and lows with erratic behavior towards my hubby (or at least, not as erratic). With all that, I'm putting out an APB on my extra weight. It's armed and extremely dangerous. It has a warrant for attempted murder, physical and mental abuse. I'm hoping it gets the death penalty...preferably by electrocution by body heat.