Well, great advice, if I could just follow it. While recuperating from surgery, I have been doing just that. TOM being on the way hasn't helped matters. I haven't dared step on the scale, for fear I am back where I started. And I worked so hard to get it off, dammit! It just frost my cookies. Oh. Bad point of reference. Frosted cookies....

I couldn't keep up with my journal entries, since I couldn't see to type them. Today, I've entered my information and will continue to keep up with this practice. It seems to help me immensely. We have thunderstorms slated for most afternoons this week. I had wanted to jog this morning (yes, jog), but my alarm clock was so soft, I didn't even hear it. Great. I also started work late, which meant no elliptical this morning either. Talk about jumping back in with both feet! I don't even have a toe in, yet.

So, tomorrow I'll put in today's journal entry. Hopefully, I'll have done what I need to do to keep moving in the right direction. I'm still hopeful, but feeling a little guilty and down on myself.

By the way, hubby purchased the Power 90X (Beach Body). I am a fan of the Beach Body Turbo Jam, which I haven't done in a bit, but really like. I hear that this is a great program, but that it can get a little boring. I don't know if he's using it as a resource, if he bought it for himself to try, or if he got it for me on the sly. Either way, I'll check it out.

Morning workout - 60 minutes on the Elliptical (625 calories)

Breakfast - one packet of Cinnamon and Spice Quaker oatmeal and a cup of instant Folgers coffee.

Lunch out with my coworkers - I had Pad Pra Ram; steamed/stir-fried veggies (broccoli, onions, carrots, squash, mushrooms) peanut sauce, chopped peanuts, steamed white rice and side salad. Water to drink.

For dinner - Dinner out with the girls: Winger's Southwest wrap with a side of steak fries. I also had a tall glass of strawberry lemonade. This was a calorie laden meal, but I did well earlier in the day. Hopefully, it won't cause too much damage.

I only drank around 50 ounces of water (not good) and I didn't take an L-Carnitine. I'm still doing the detox, though.

Morning Workout - Elliptical trainer 60 minutes (628 calories burned. I find going forward first, then going backward for the last half burns many more calories).

Breakfast - Instant Folgers coffee with splenda; 1.5 packets of Quaker Cinnamon and Spice oatmeal

Lunch - I was supposed to go to a Chinese Restaurant for lunch, but it was moved to next Thursday. Thank goodness I thought to bring mine from home just in case. :) Mixed stir fried veggies (broccoli, mushrooms, water chestnuts) and cubed chicken breasts with satay sauce (2 tsp.) with Jasmine rice (about 1/2 cup).

Snack - small bowl of honey bunches of oats

Dinner - One "State Fair" corn dog, 4 potstickers and a small bowl of cereal. I could have had my chicken, but wanted something quick (as it was 8:45pm when I ate...I know. Very far after 7:00pm. I will get better). This will be my second night without hubby. I did not sleep well last night (he says he didn't sleep at all).

Well, with all my personal troubles, I haven't had much of an appetite (see New Dawn site). I'm not advocating this way of "dieting" or "eating right" because it really isn't "eating right"; however, the scale was kind this morning at 160.5 and I'm certainly not complaining. As it stands, I'm officially smaller than I was in June of 2004 (my smallest since starting this blog in 2003). It's truly a milestone! The last time I was this close to being in the 150s, I had just gotten married.

Now, I'm getting nostalgic and feeling sad. Ten years ago, I was probably this weight and ten years ago, the only place my hubby wanted to be was near me. Currently, he's in a race to get clear so that we can "think" and "work things out". I'm just so afraid of what this will lead to! In the meantime, I can't think straight and I'm not eating properly, so I'm hitting these awesome numbers that, yeah I'm sort of happy about, but I'd much rather have my hubby. The wild thing is that he's been going on and on for the past few days about how much he loves me and wants everything to work out. I want the same things, but I want him here, too. Sleeping alone has been incredibly difficult for me and I feel sort of weak saying this.

Meanwhile, (and on a happier note) I'm sort of hard, I guess is the best word to describe it. I went to scratch my upper thigh the other day and it felt like rock or a rod had been inserted into my leg. It was sort of weird and unsettling at first. I asked my hubby what it could be (this was a few days ago when we were still playing "house" and all was well) and he said, "Uh, that's muscle honey." Yeah, well I guess I already knew that but just needed some sort of confirmation of the fact. It was weird and still is. I'll grab my legs to walk up the steps and, wow! Steel! I just can't see the definition like I'd like to or maybe it's there and I'm having body issues. Who knows.

For the first time in nearly a year, I changed my imood display. I have a feeling it will be "sad and pitiful" for a while.

I woke up raring to go for my workout on Saturday, since I again missed Water Aerobics class (taxes...fun, fun, fun). I got my sweat-on to FitPrime's Floor Burn with Susan Harris (the picture is of a different FitPrime video which I hope to acquire. I couldn't find a picture of Susan's). My abs were killing me on Sunday...similarly to how I felt a few days after my C-section. Coughing was painful, so I tried to sissyfy my coughs to avoid pain.

The leg portion of the workout didn't seem to have the same effect, which tells me it either wasn't that great or that my legs are in better shape than I thought. I knew my abs were in sad shape (and still are) so, I've got to make sure to work in more workouts that target my abs. It will be better for me in the long run and a quicker road to having a waist again. The plan was to workout with one of the Firm classics but, if you check out today's post on my other site, you'll understand why I didn't have the energy or motivation to do it...despite waking up to the alarm on time an everything. I can't say that I'll get it in later...I'm not sure. I just hope that the news I receive today will make life feel a little better.