The Love Below/The Love Above

With last week's check, I lost my mind a little bit. I went out and bought The Love Below/Speakerboxxx and Elephunk and I'm loving both. It's been a while since I purchased music and I figured, I owed it to myself to get a little culture in this culturally drained state I live in. I won't wait so long again. Talk about ambitious! This two disc collection by Outkast is the shiz-nit, for real. I also watched VH1's Driven series, featuring the group. If life had happened a bit differently for me, I probably would have ended up in school with these guys (both born in Georgia, same city, the same year, and they attended tri-city, which is probably where my parents would have sent me ). I also thought about the wonderful blend of this duo. Also, like me, they were raised on the pop music of the 80's (Duran Duran, Madonna, The Cure) while still appreciating the hooks and rhythms of early hip hop. They are so different, but blend so well. Turns out, Andre is Gemini and Big Boi (Antwan) is an Aquarius (like me and my hubby). Far stretch, I know, but I saw similarities. I'm also digging B.E.P. Did you know Fergie was Stacy Ferguson from Kids Incorporated and Wild Orchid? I saw her perform live with Wild Orchid as one of the opening acts for Cher in 2000. She's got some chops on her, that girl. And talk about an image overhaul! She used to look like a Barbie, now she's got that ghetto B-girl thing going on. It works for her. I just hope this is the true her, and not some act for the sake of being in the group.

The weekend went well, food wise. I did splurge on Saturday and got a burger from one of those old fashioned 50's burger joints in my neighborhood. It was really good and I was satisfied afterwards (I used to eat a hamburger and crave another one, because they never seemed to touch the bottom of my stomach).

I've been struggling with my crossroads issues and ended up breaking down last night. Hubby was wonderful, as usual. The crazy thing was, I didn't even know why I was crying until I started talking it out. I ended up sitting outside on the front stoop, for a while. I watched the sun set and the stars awaken. It was truly beautiful. I took a few moments to pray and ask for the clarity I've been searching for so desperately. Afterwards, I went inside and messed around on the computer for a couple of hours. Climbing into bed at 10:30 (late for me), I went to sleep pretty peacefully. This morning, on the way to work, it came to me: I have to fast for two days. If your not a spiritual person, then this may not make any sense, but it made total sense to me. You see, I feel like God is always talking to me. Sometimes, my ears are erect and heartily soaking up everything he has to say. Other times, I'm in total deaf-mode. This morning, I was fully aware of the reasons why and understood that my clarity of mind will come if I clear my body first. I am allowed liquids of all kinds, except alcohol. It's not about weight, it's not about proving something, it's about finding out what I'm supposed to do and, hopefully, begin my journey again in the right direction.