Why My Vacation Sucked - by me

It's really quite sad. Several days planned for oodles of fun turn into stir-fried crap on a stick. I thought after Thursday, surely things will get better. Well, they didn't. I didn't go swimming with hubby and the babe Thursday because I was in such a mood and furious with him for putting me off in order to meet his friends at the pool. Then, he comes back and lays a bombshell on me (you know, the kind that totally shakes your world). Afterwards, I was pretty much a wreck all weekend. We did go to Park City on Friday and spent an almost pleasant day together. Saturday, I played the Sims for a big chunk of the day, while he was away running errands and hanging out with friends. Sunday, we stayed home for a bit, then went to the mall for a bit of shopping (but I was still so frazzled from Thursday's events, that I couldn't really enjoy that either). Yesterday, I finally got a chance to go swimming, but it was a lot more of the same introspective thinking and contemplating my life, while trying to enjoy myself (not a good combination).

Today, I'm feeling vulnerable and totally exposed. I don't want to be here at all. I'm not sure where I want to be. If I were at home, I'd just be miserable there too, so I suspect being miserable here will have to do. (Oh, and it also didn't help to come into 616 emails. Damn! I was only gone five days!? Now do you see why I have to leave this place? Nobody should have to endure this. What jackass in my office thinks this is normal and okay?)



Mother made me feel better, thankfully. <7:38>

Let's pray this week goes better than the last one...let's pray really hard because I don't think I can take much more of this. I feel like a time bomb, not really at postal level, but maybe at run-around-the-office-screaming-pulling-my-hair-out level. I don't want it to come to that because I'll end up in a padded room, talking to myself.

It's probably better to just go ahead and concentrate on getting this mountain of work done. I sent a note to my boss telling him to look at the account and the asinine number therein. Once he does that, I asked him to let me know. I want him to be able to see (as proof) what kind of hell I'm up against. Perhaps this is just the ammunition he needs to prove it to the president of this backwards University, who doesn't think that we need extra help. That's still flooring me. My mother said that because we started off small, there is small thinking in the minds of management. She said that she's unsure how you get past that, but she's seen it time and time again. I don't have time for them to figure out how to get their heads out of their butts and figure it out. I really don't. The combination of passive-aggressiveness and small mindedness isn't working for me anymore. Something has got to change and soon. (Still praying really hard...).