When Your Child Cries, "Daddy".

This morning, my little one and I were making our commute into town. We were listening to the radio and every so often she would say, "Mommy, what's this song called?" and I'd do my best to tell her, if I could even distinguish a title. At close to the end of our ride, she says, "Mommy, I miss my daddy." Well, my heart just broke. "He didn't come in and kiss me goodnight, because he was sleeping. I don't see my daddy." That's about when my hard crumbled into a million pieces. She's right. This changing shifts business has gotten his sleeping habits all screwed up.

initially, he was supposed to work his shift, then come home and go straight to bed. A little before we get home, he's supposed to get up, and be available by the time we get home. Unfortunately, he's all wired from working and can't fall right to sleep. The last couple of days, he's been up all day doing one thing or another then he crashes by the time we get home. Therefore, neither myself nor the babe have any quality time with him. I guess I hadn't notice how much it was bothering us because last night, I didn't sleep well at all. The babe kept popping awake too. Then, I turned my alarm clock off and almost slept the day away. Luckily, I woke up fifteen minutes before we were supposed to leave (luckily?). I called him on his cell phone, on our way to work and only received his voicemail. I can't remember, but it seems like he has an appointment today with a trainee. I can't even keep up with his schedule anymore!

Something will have to change because this is just how it was when he worked on swing shift, except now it's worse. There's a child involved. Not only that, he's actually home, but we can't do anything about that. Waking him up is like waking up the dead. I can't believe we have to endure this for a year. Oh, brother.

Well, not to be all doom and gloom today. I do have some promising news. As I've been checking the classifieds, things are looking up. I'm starting to find things that I qualify for and that pay a decent amount. The trick is the pay. I'm at a point in my life where I know my worth, so that's what I want to be paid. It may prevent me from obtaining certain positions, but I really don't care. I work hard and am good at what I do. Most people feel like they should be paid what they are worth, well now, I'm acting on that. I went to school, I've gained experience and have definitely paid my dues. It's my turn.